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“Well, you wouldn’t, would you?” The Voice was really getting tetchy, now, “Mr Russell Charles Atkins, who prefers to be called Charlie.”“Why wouldn’t I see a queue, Mr Human Reception, formerly known as St P?” Two can play at that game.“Say you were ISIS or the Taliban and you’d blown yourself up in a crowded marketplace; would you want to see the housewives, traders, passers-by and other victims immediately behind or in front of you in the queue, and them to see you with the remnants of a suicide pack across your shoulders?”“No, I guess not.”Just then a thin weedy chap appeared from nowhere and stood beside me.“I got here first, mate!” I said, forcibly, establishing my claim, “Ok mush?”So much for the bloody individual queue arrangement, it was more rubbish than the bloody new entry system.“I’m your Official Human Handler Operative, sir, you were too quick for me.”“Jesus Christ!” The Voice snapped, “Not three words to replace one, but now it’s four! Heaven help us!”“What do you. As I started looking at the table that had all the thongs on them, a salesperson came up behind me and asked, ‘Can I help you find anything?’ I turned and looked and it was Sharon! Sharon was my next door neighbor. She used to babysit my sister and I when we were little kids. She was also a mentor to my sister in cheerleading and is the one person both my sister and I can both say got us to start exercising regularly. I looked at her to see if there was any form of recognition. Finally I said, ‘Um, yeah. I’m looking for a thong. This is my first time buying panties for myself.’ A strange expression crossed her face and then she said, ‘That’s fine. We get a lot of that here. What size are you?’ I didn’t know how to answer that and I looked around for my sister and Emily. I didn’t see them. ‘I don’t know. My mom usually buys my undergarments.’ Sharon smiled. ‘Well, why don’t we go over here and find out.’ She took my hand and led me over to the dressing rooms. She took a key off her.
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